What if?

The other day (while drunk) I had a fairly deep conversation with my mother about “What If?”. In this conversation I was talking about several things such as all my potential as a soccer player having played with Hibs for 3 years and being tipped as a “player of the future” (to quote Waterford Soccer Monthly”). If I was indeed a player of the future and I had stuck with the soccer then maybe I’d be in England today under contract with a top tier team as a goalkeeper or as a midfielder and therefore wouldn’t have met anyone who I know today!

Once I grew bored of soccer I went through a senile period where I did absolutely nothing. If I hadn’t become so obsessed with the computer during this time then I would have never been forced into a new pastime - rowing! I must admit that I took the rowing very seriously and as a result I was extremely fit and was able to run for miles and lift anything that was given to me. Which brings me onto the tower. It was the sole reason that I quit rowing, because at the the end of the day I was getting paid to serve and clear a few plates and I wasn’t being paid a penny to dedicate 6 days a week to try and remain competitive as a rower.

Sometimes I look at my body and ask myself what I’d be like if I kept on rowing. I think noone can doubt that I would be extremely fit with vein’s bulging out left, right and centre but I would have never worked in the Tower and met some of the soundest people imaginable and I can sure as hell guarentee that I wouldn’t be coming in at 3 in the morning totally pissed and with an urge to post to my blog which wouldn’t exist if I hadn’t got into webdesign back when I was in 5th class in Primary School!

It’s times like this which make me wonder if it’s worth thinking of things like this. There’s a Limp Bizkit song with a name that eludes me at the moment but it goes “What’s done is done, just leave it alone, and don’t regret it” and while I don’t usually respect anything that comes out of Fred Durst’s mouth, I’m afraid that I’m going to have to believe him in this case.

Life could very well have turned out a lot different to what it has done but I don’t think I should be wasting time thinking of the “shoulda, woulda, coulda’s” of life and instead spend my time thinking of how to deal with my present life, the life which has been dealt to me!

tagslife, philosophy, drunk, job, rowingtags