5 hours early and still queuing!

It could only happen to us! We arrived at Belfast International Airport 5 hours before check in having somehow missed the clearly sign posted bypass and made our own way to the airport by driving through village after village. Despite the fact that at one point we thought we were the only people on the Amsterdam flight, we still managed to find ourselves at the back of a long queue!

Thankfully we weren’t kept waiting for long and the check-in ladies were hot enough to pass the time. We were somewhat late for check-in because we found a bar serving at 4am. We must’ve been on our 4th pint by time we stumbled upon the check-in area! We boarded the flight and waited eagerly for the drinks trolley to come along! Even though we were flying through the air at 570mph, we still drank away, oblivious to the fact that it was still only 7am!

Needless to say, we were absolutely hammered landing in Schipol Airport and asked every single person in a high-vis jacket for directions, even the builders! What struck me straight away was that almost everyone has great English, and to think that I was going to bring a dictionary! While most people were happy to help, some people wanted money in exchange for the directions. It may have only been €2, but I didn’t want to pay for the privilege of being sent 5 miles in the wrong direction!

So you’ve probably guessed that I’ve arrived safely, which is always a good start to a holiday. No matter what way we leave the hotel, we have sex shows and coffee shops waiting to take our money… I can’t wait!

My Friend Recession!

For the past three years, I’ve been employed in industries which have been fairly reliant on people having money floating about! I’ve worked in a hotel since 2005 and have slowly seen its trade deteriorate! As of the beginning of this year, I’ve joined an industry that’s been very reliant on the Celtic Tiger, the poker industry! I have seen drastic changes to both industries in a short period of time and as the country starts to tighten their belts, I’m forced to follow!

Last year I’d be lucky to go a day without a bus load of medicated Americans pulling up at the door of the hotel. I don’t use the term medicated lightly, because I swear to God they each have one suitcase for nothing but medicine! If the fat bastards exercised every once in a while then they wouldn’t need as much…. just a thought! Anyway, rant aside, this year the hotel is dead. Barmen are scratching their balls instead of pulling pints, porters do nothing but fluff pillows and receptionists invent phone calls to keep themselves occupied. Last year the average wedding size was in the 200s, now we’re lucky to see weddings of a 100 grace the premises! I think a situation last week is the best example of how bad things are getting, I was in the bar for a function of 50 people for a Wedding Anniversary. After 6 hours, the total drinks bill came to under €100. That’s an average spend of 33c per person per hour! You could argue that they weren’t heavy drinkers, but I alone would have spent €100 quid in 6 hours!

The poker industry in Ireland is something that on one hand can be said to be flourishing, but on the other can be said to be floundering. While record numbers of players are reportedly making a living from it, it’s clear that these are all established players. The amount of casual players is dwindling as they realise that it’s not just a bit of fun anymore as they lose their bollocks every week! Numbers are falling in all the major events and the recently announced IPO will be a real test of the feasibility of poker events in this country. Last year it attracted over 1000 players and with more significant marketing power behind it this year, they expect numbers to rise. Whether it will or not is the million dollar question.

I’m a bit worried that the only two industries that I’ve been involved in, are heavily reliant on a strong economy. Considering that seems to be going to shit, I wonder is a career change in order! Perhaps I’ll become an undertaker, I hear people are just dying to use their services…

On the other side of the bar

So, I started work in the bar in work. I look upon it as a graduation of sorts, even though I’m only wearing a different colour uniform! I’m liking it so far and am getting to grips with how everything works, although admittedly I haven’t been on until finish on any of the days yet! The latest I’ve been working is 2am which was for the Newtown Debs, which brought back some painful memories from when I was at the other side of the bar the year before, ordering triples by the minute!

The night started off with mostly everyone being responsible, as did mine from what I can remember but within moments I could point out the people who were going to be absolutely hammered by the end of the night. There was one guy in particular who reminded me of myself this time last year. He kept ordering obscure drinks that he was trying for the first time and when he could no longer afford them, he started doing straight vodka!

I had discovered Sambucha for the first time at my own Debs and whereas everyone else was ordering pints of Heineken etc, I was ordering 3 shots of Sambucha! It didn’t take long for me to realise that if I moved from the bar, I’d just fall onto the ground - so I spent the rest of my night (the keyword being MY) holding myself up at the bar. Of course, people started buying me drinks because I was standing by the bar and I managed to drink enough to make me think I didn’t need the support of the counter to stand up straight - I did!

My own Debs night drew to a close at about half one in the morning, while the music was still playing and the bar still serving - I’m such a lightweight! I distinctly remember being in my hotel room at that time getting sick all over the carpet to the sound of “Sweet Dreams” with my date nowhere to be seen! The fact that girls were offering me head for free drink the other night really shows just how badly I messed up my Debs night!

Thursday nights Debs was a cakewalk so to speak. Only 90 odd people. We’re catering for 350 or so in the coming weeks. I have no doubt that there will be about 50 odd people like me at that Debs. At least I had the decency not to get sick on the dancefloor or piss myself like people did the other night!